Despite urine, Portland water tests clean

"I don't drink water; fish [expletive deleted] in it." — Attributed to W.C. Fields

Reservoir flush proceeds

By Maria L. La Ganga, LA Times
3:42 PM PDT, April 17, 2014

The teenager in a hoodie and baggy jeans starred in a grainy black-and-white surveillance video shot shortly after 1 a.m. Wednesday. Authorities responded. Criminal charges are under consideration.

Just what was the crime? Police say Dallas Jeffrey Delynn, 18, of southeast Portland urinated into a reservoir that slakes the thirst of this Oregon city’s 600,000 or so residents. He zipped up. He smirked. He did not wash his hands.

Cue the disgusted “Ewwwwws!” right here, for so very many reasons.

And, of course, cue the online furor, which seemed to be directed not at the young barbarian, but at the city whose drinking supply he allegedly defiled.

In the incident’s wake, the Portland Water Bureau immediately ordered tests of Mt. Tabor Reservoir No. 5 for “possible contamination.” But even before the results came back, the agency began to drain 38 million gallons of potable water. The process will take about a week.

All because of a cup or two of human urine.

(More here.)