Why Verbal Tee-Ups Like 'To Be Honest' Often Signal Insincerity

James W. Pennebaker, of the University of Texas, Austin, says these phrases are a form of dishonesty

By Elizabeth Bernstein, WSJ
Jan. 20, 2014 5:39 p.m. ET

Use of conversational 'tee-ups' can obscure what you are trying to say, but also may signal that you are being insincere. Adam Doughty

A friend of mine recently started a conversation with these words: "Don't take this the wrong way…"

I wish I could tell you what she said next. But I wasn't listening—my brain had stalled. I was bracing for the sentence that would follow that phrase, which experience has taught me probably wouldn't be good.

Certain phrases just seem to creep into our daily speech. We hear them a few times and suddenly we find ourselves using them. We like the way they sound, and we may find they are useful. They may make it easier to say something difficult or buy us a few extra seconds to collect our next thought.

Yet for the listener, these phrases are confusing. They make it fairly impossible to understand, or even accurately hear, what the speaker is trying to say.

(More here.)