Intelligent Design Made Simple
TOM MAERTENS
The Kansas Board of Education has decreed that Intelligent Design should be taught in science classes alongside evolution. Here is a notional version of their text:
"Once upon a time, there was an Intelligent Designer who lived someplace far away. He is the one who created the universe because it is very complicated and somebody must have created it. Supernatural scientists hope some day to produce evidence for this.
"Evolution says that life happened because of spontaneous mutilation of our jeans and the survival of the fattest. This theory is bad because it uses only natural science. Intelligent Design also uses supernatural science.
"People who don't know supernatural science sometimes raise questions about birth defects and diseases. Supernatural scientists believe all evil in the world is caused by invisible beings that rebelled against the Intelligent Designer and now roam the world (sometimes disguised as talking snakes) doing bad things. They must be responsible because a higher intelligence would not make diseases and birth defects. Supernatural scientists hope some day to produce evidence for this.
"Some questions about Intelligent Design are not yet settled. For example, supernatural scientists don't know if the human appendix was engineered by evil invisible beings or by the Intelligent Designer as a quick destruct mechanism for people off course.
"Evil metaphysical beings can also be responsible for natural disasters like hurricanes, tsunamis, or a rain of frogs, although sometimes the Intelligent Designer uses disasters and plagues to secretly test people or to punish them.
"Some supernatural scientists believe that the Intelligent Designer wanted George Bush to be President but there is no consensus as to whether this is a test or a punishment."
(Reprinted from the Mankato Free Press, January 8, 2006)
The Kansas Board of Education has decreed that Intelligent Design should be taught in science classes alongside evolution. Here is a notional version of their text:
"Once upon a time, there was an Intelligent Designer who lived someplace far away. He is the one who created the universe because it is very complicated and somebody must have created it. Supernatural scientists hope some day to produce evidence for this.
"Evolution says that life happened because of spontaneous mutilation of our jeans and the survival of the fattest. This theory is bad because it uses only natural science. Intelligent Design also uses supernatural science.
"People who don't know supernatural science sometimes raise questions about birth defects and diseases. Supernatural scientists believe all evil in the world is caused by invisible beings that rebelled against the Intelligent Designer and now roam the world (sometimes disguised as talking snakes) doing bad things. They must be responsible because a higher intelligence would not make diseases and birth defects. Supernatural scientists hope some day to produce evidence for this.
"Some questions about Intelligent Design are not yet settled. For example, supernatural scientists don't know if the human appendix was engineered by evil invisible beings or by the Intelligent Designer as a quick destruct mechanism for people off course.
"Evil metaphysical beings can also be responsible for natural disasters like hurricanes, tsunamis, or a rain of frogs, although sometimes the Intelligent Designer uses disasters and plagues to secretly test people or to punish them.
"Some supernatural scientists believe that the Intelligent Designer wanted George Bush to be President but there is no consensus as to whether this is a test or a punishment."
(Reprinted from the Mankato Free Press, January 8, 2006)
Powered by Blogger
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home